Not only do researchers study what happiness is, but they’ve researched the specific daily practices we can engage in to promote joyful living. If you’re feeling “stuck” or aren’t sure about specific habits you’d like to change, take a look at this list and see if anything here inspires you!
Research-Based Practices for Joyful Living
1. Practice Gratitude
Gratitude is one of the simplest practices there is that can boost our happiness. Time and again, the research shows that people who take time to “count their blessings” are happier — and NOT just because happy people have so dang much to be thankful for! Well-designed studies show that it’s the practice of gratitude that causes the improvement in mood.
And the best news? You don’t have to do it every day! Research shows that practicing gratitude just ONCE A WEEK is enough to have a demonstrable impact on your happiness. So start keeping a gratitude journal, or make thankfulness part of your family’s routines — gratitude is, as all of these suggestions are, a PRACTICE.
2. Practice Optimism
You don’t need to become all Pollyanna and believe you live in “the best of all possible worlds,” but becoming more aware of your thinking (see below) and trying to see something from a different perspective can really help. Is this a failure, or a learning opportunity? Is this “no” giving you the space for something else to say “yes” to?
3. Be Aware of Your Thinking
The more you practice mindfulness, the more you will notice your habitual thought patterns. Be on the lookout for times when you say, “This ALWAYS happens,” or “I SHOULD really….,” or “He NEVER…” These are usually “mind-traps” that keep us stuck in suffering.
4. Engage in Deliberate Acts of Kindness
Lyubomirsky says we should intentionally do good things for others — but not just “randomly.” Research shows that we are most benefitted by kind acts when we 1) vary the kind things we do and 2) do several kind things at once (as opposed to just doing one small nice thing a day).
And while we’re on the topic of kindness, don’t forget to include yourself.
5. Nurture Your Friendships
We are social mammals. We thrive when we have meaningful connections with other people. In fact, having a strong social network has the same impact on your physical health as quitting smoking!
Nurture your relationships through quality time with your friends and family. If geography allows, aim for face-to-face time (not FaceTime), eye contact vs. iContact. We thrive on touch (be a hugger!), and the give-and-take of in-person social connection.
Seek out meaningful ways to be involved in your community — perhaps at your kids’ school or through classes for adults (check with city offices or the public schools). Volunteer, or find other ways to engage in kind acts for others.
6. Find Meaning in Your Struggles
We can all think of a time in our life when things were hard, or even miserable, but we ultimately learned something from the experience. Even if we can’t find the meaning right now, can we trust that it will be there someday?
7. Forgive Yourself and Others
You can learn more about forgiveness in this article on my blog.
8. Engage in “Flow” Activities
Mihaly Csikszentmihalyi describes “flow” as “being completely involved in an activity for its own sake. The ego falls away. Time flies. Every action, movement, and thought follows inevitably from the previous one, like playing jazz. Your whole being is involved, and you’re using your skills to the utmost.” We experience flow when we are engaged in an activity that is challenging, but we have just-the-right-amount of ability to meet that challenge.
And this explanation of flow, from Wikipedia, will ring true with our previous lesson about the self:
a state of concentration or complete absorption with the activity at hand and the situation. It is a state in which people are so involved in an activity that nothing else seems to matter. The idea of flow is identical to the feeling of being in the zone or in the groove. The flow state is an optimal state of intrinsic motivation, where the person is fully immersed in what he is doing. This is a feeling everyone has at times, characterized by a feeling of great absorption, engagement, fulfillment, and skill—and during which temporal concerns (time, food, ego-self, etc.) are typically ignored.”
What are your “flow” activities? Perhaps these are some of things to focus on doing MORE of in 2017.
9. Savor Joyful Moments
We are primed to remember the bad things that happen to us, as they are more evolutionarily significant. We need to spend some time savoring the good things that happen to make them “stick.” Pause during your day to make note of all that is good and joyful. (And when something really good happens, researchers tell us to spend 10-30 seconds savoring it to transform it into a pleasant experience).
10. Meditate
Yep, we’ll talk more about this one!
11. Exercise
Not only is it good for your health, but many studies show that exercise is as effective as antidepressants for mild to moderate depression. It releases all sorts of feel-good hormones in your body. It’s legal blood-doping!
12. Cultivate Awe
Most of us, according to the research, only experience awe once or twice a week. Awe –the feeling of being in the presence of something larger than oneself, or of taking in something that doesn’t quite fit with one’s preconceived ideas — is a generally pleasurable experience, and it’s also good for us! Research shows that when feel awe, our sense of self-importance and feelings of entitlement go down, and we are more inclined to act with generosity. It also reduces inflammation in our bodies!
When do we experience awe? Again, the research tells us that we’re likely to feel awe when 1) we are outside, in the vastness of the natural world, and 2) when we witness unexpected acts of goodness and kindness.
So get outside, look for the good, and feel the awesome!
13. Write in a Journal
And actually write, don’t type! Therapists would tell you this is one of the most effective things you can do for your mental health!
14. Make Time for Self-Care
You can find lots of ideas for self-care in this post on my blog.
15. Make Time for Play and Creativity
We’re just WAY TOO SERIOUS sometimes! As much as we complain about stress and busy-ness, we somehow feel like we’re doing it wrong if we’re NOT frazzled and exhausted every day!
Make time for PLAY, for the things that are just fun and goofy and make you laugh. Play a game with your kids, put some music on and dance, watch some laugh-out-loud videos on YouTube, listen to a funny audio book, get creative and color or craft or paint… just do something for the sheer sake of it being enjoyable… whether it’s “productive” or not.
This is not an exhaustive list, nor is it tomorrow’s agenda! Think of this as a menu, and choose the practices that are BEST for you!
Ready to start getting some clarity on your year? Click here to download the “My 2017” funsheet. It provides you with one page to list your values, your dreams, your strengths, etc., and see what jumps out at you as a focus for the year ahead. Remember — there’s no right or wrong answer…. and this is the tough part of the course where I can’t tell you exactly what to do!